To Be Single Mother..?

Things change all the time.

We grow. We learn. We make dumb decisions.

I made a dumb one literally a week ago.

(I think?)

I started trusting him again. I started letting him in again but it seems that that was a dumb move.

He got back from chasing, I thought everything was fun but it wasn’t. He was acting different. Strange. Some of his stuff was missing but he still says he’s moving in at the end of July. It’s confusing. Am I making the right choice?

He acts fine then he acts weird. I don’t know what to do. What do I do?!

I starting coming to the realization that I might actually be a single mom. I know my mom will always be there to help but it’s not the same. She can’t give me the emotional support like he can.

But it’s okay.

My mom was a single parent and I grew up fine. I grew up with an amazing life. I was very close to my grandma, she was like my second mom literally.

I know I’ll be okay but will she?

She’s going to grow up with some of the same questions I had. I never wanted that.

He says he’s not leaving us but it feels like it.

Well. Like he’s leaving me.

He will be there for her but not for me. Even tho I’ve pretty much gone this whole pregnancy alone with him being there part not even half of the time.

I can do this. I need to keep telling myself that.

I can.

Here’s the 24 week photo. Oh I look so happy with a big baby bump.

2 thoughts on “To Be Single Mother..?

  1. You’re beautiful. Sorry you’re dealing with drama with the guy though. Stay as strong as you can. Being a single mom that doesn’t have to be your destiny. Surely there’s someone out there that would enjoy being with you and also partner with you in taking care of your child. May take time though but its definitely not a mark against you having a kid.

    Liked by 1 person

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